Eyes closed
by InukiStar
Summary: A "what if" story that takes place after "The Rebellion of the Northern tribes". Touma pays a visit to Seiji but this turns out to be bittersweet reunion for he is reminded of what he has lost.


Disclaimer: The Troopers and their universe do not belong to me but to their respective creators (whose name escapes me at the moment). Azhure, Orion and Silver belong to me and as for Aikyo and Rin, these characters belong to my friends Annette and Linda Marie.

About the story: I mainly wrote this fanfic for me and my two friends so yes, there will be pairings and yes, there will be romance. However, the story is mainly about the Troopers and how they will deal with a new threat. Love stories are on the side but not the main subject of this story. Also, I wrote that like I was reading a manga so if you want to have a better idea about the facial expressions and the action scenes, do the same.

About comments: Feel free to send me constructive comments about the story.

About misspellings: English is not my first language so, despite the fact that I'm not an awful writer, I'm sure there is grammar errors and misspellings in my chapters. Do not be shy to tell me about it and I shall correct the mistake right away. For future references, feel free to also explain to me the mistake to not repeat it. ^-^

Eyes closed

Spring has been wonderful so far and today was no exception: delicate but warm weather with no clouds and chipping birds. A warm wind blew through his blue hair as he rang at the door of the Date Dojo. He felt his stomach knot itself as the maid opened the door. Of course, he was happy to visit his old friend but his visits were always bittersweet.

"Yes?" the maid asked him with a shy voice.

"I'm Hashiba Touma, an old friend of Seiji. He's expecting me today," the young man replied, hiding his nervousness.

"Ah yes," she replied. "He's currently busy giving a kendo class but I will take you to Mrs Date." That was exactly what he feared, but he nodded nonetheless. He followed the maid through the house. Despite a class being held, it was very quiet. The only sound that could be heard was the old grandfather clock in the hallway. The floors were so clean that Touma was able to see his face in it. He couldn't help but be amazed by such neatness but knowing this is where Seiji lived, it was not all that surprising.

The young lady took him to the inner garden where Mrs Date was. She asked him to wait at the entrance of the garden to give her time to introduce him to the lady of the house. After he nodded, he watched her leave. From where he was standing, he could see Seiji's wife: she was sitting in the middle of the garden, with some cherry blossom petals flowing around her, a bird perched on her right index. When the maid approached, the bird flew away and the wife turned her gaze behind her. The maid told her a few words and Touma saw the lady stood up with a big smile.

"Touma!" Azhure called. "Don't you stand there! You know you're always an honored guest here!" The archer sighed slightly and went to her side, putting on a false smile.

"Azhure, I'm glad to see you're doing well. But you shouldn't be so excited. Think of the child."

"Oh, don't worry. Seiji makes sure I stay put most of the day," Azhure sighed. "I swear, just because the baby's coming soon, I've been ordered to stay sit most of the day. But I can walk. Care for a little stroll around the garden?" Her smile made his heart melt. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't refuse. With a nod, he offered his arm, which she gladly took, and they both started to walk slowly around the garden. "How have you been lately? We don't see you often like the others. Is everything ok?" she asked him.

"Everything is fine. I'm just very taken by my job." _And I can't stand to see you too often. I'm scared of what I might do_.

"Your father keeps you that busy?"

"Not really. I just love it so much that I don't see the time pass. But I listened to your advice: I hired someone to make me lunch so I don't skip meals anymore."

"Good! You're so skinny already. You need to take better care of your health."

"You talk like my mother." She giggled at the remark.

"Someone has to. You don't have a girlfriend to take care of you." As she passed her hand through his hair, he felt himself blush. "You need a good girl that will take good care of you. Someone with a good level of intellect too because she needs to be able to understand what you're talking about and who is independent enough to not wait for you to do her things."

_You're the one I needed, but I was too foolish at the time to realize it_.

"Add to this the comprehension that your research is important, you'll have the perfect couple," the young woman told him as she hugged his arm.

"I would prefer that we stop talking about me getting a girlfriend. I'm fine, really."

"Are you sure? With Shuu and Rin waiting on their third and Aikyo and Shin having two kids, don't you feel lonely?"

"Ryo is alone too and you don't talk about him getting a girlfriend."

"Ryo always been a loner and I think that his heart died with Luna. He likes his job as much as you but at least, he has wild animals to talk to. That keeps him sane. You, on the other hand, have chemicals, bottles, samples and test tubes. You need more social interactions."

"You will never stop to worry about me, huh?" he told with a small chuckle.

"You're my best friend. Of course I will always be worried about you!"

_But it's not friendship I want from you. God, when Seiji is done with his class? This reunion is killing me!_ "I'm wondering if Aikyo's love for matchmaking didn't somehow influence you."

"Nonesense! You're seeing things. Besides, I'm not constantly forcing you to meet young women that might interest you. I'm just concerned about how separate from us all you've been. We barely see you anymore, ever since the wedding."

_Oh crap! Don't tell me she realizes my feelings for her. No. I didn't want that! I don't want to give trouble to one of my best friends. Seiji! Where are you?!_

"Azhure! Touma! There you are!" Seiji called from afar. He walked toward them, smiling and beaming, his kendo outfit still on. The master of the house was still sweaty from his lesson but that didn't stop his wife from going to him and kissed him tenderly, her big belly pressed on him. Touma glanced at the side. He couldn't bear to see the scene. Every time he saw her kissed her husband, he felt like his heart was crushed. The pain was so intense the first times that he thought he was having a cardiac arrest but now, he was used to the pain. "Did you miss me?" the blond asked to his wife.

"Always," she replied with a small giggle before hugging him. "I was in need of hugs."

"I see that my timing is perfect, as usual," he replied with a gentle smile, hugging her back. He looked up at Touma. "I'm glad to see you, Touma. It's been a while." He offered his hand to his friend and both men shook hands. "I see you've been taking Azhure for a little walk. I'm glad because I know how she hates to sit around all day."

"It was nothing. It's always a pleasure to talk with old friends."

"Shall we have some tea?" Seiji asked.

"That's a good idea. I feel tired already so to sit down would be a good idea," Azhure replied, looking up to Seiji.

_But you complained about being forced to sit down two minutes ago_. The dark blue Trooper couldn't help it but laugh at Azhure. Married or not, pregnant or not, the magician he met when they were 16 years old was still the same girl. Seiji called the maid and gave her specific instructions for the tea and he took Azhure and Touma to a nice table under the blooming trees. They started a small talk but by the time the tea arrived, Azhure rested her head on Seiji's shoulder and fell asleep.

"Is she ok?" Touma asked, worried.

"She tires easily," Seiji replied, gently stroking Azhure's exposing cheek with his index. "The pregnancy has been very difficult but luckily, we're going through this fine."

"I'm sorry. I wish I could do more."

"Do not worry," his friend told him, shaking his head. "You've been here for us. That's all that matters."

"It's….the least I could do."

"Touma," Seiji started with a serious tone, "I know how you feel about her. Everyone does." The comment caught the blue hair man off guard. He tried to keep his composure. "We knew before you even realized it. She…loved you too back then you know."

"Please, Seiji… I don't want to talk about it."

"But I need to talk about it," Seiji insisted. "Don't worry. I know her. She's sleeping deeply. She cannot hear us." Touma looked down at the table, fixing his tea cup. "I need to know what will happen to us."

"Us?"

"You and me. Are we…going to always feel awkward about this? I don't like this to be honest. I want you to know that I never intended to steal her away from you. Unlike you, I didn't fall in love with her instantly."

"Seiji, stop," Touma told him firmly. "You have nothing to feel guilty about. I know exactly what happened. She was crushed. I was too blind to realize how I truly felt about her. I thought I loved Kayura. Her charms blinded me, confused me. If only I…" He sighed. If only he what? He made so many mistakes back in the Youjakai with Kayura. The most painful one was that their relationship didn't last that long at all, despite what Azhure did to keep them together. She sacrificed so much for his happiness that in the end, she sacrificed even her own feelings about him. She drifted into a depression. He didn't see that. He was too busy with Kayura to notice it. No one told him about it too because they didn't want to bother him with it and they thought that seeing Touma would hurt Azhure more. In the end, it was Seiji who helped her out. They had a special relationship ever since they started to share their nightmares. She trusted him and he trusted her. They understood each other well but not as much as Azhure was able to understand Touma. However, by the time he realized that, she was engaged to Seiji. He thought that maybe if he revealed his feelings to her, she will come to him. Sadly, he noticed how faithful and attached she was to his friend. He couldn't bring himself to tell her how he feel and his friendship was more important than a girl, no matter how much he loved that woman. He decided to take the path she took for him: sacrifice for her happiness.

"Touma…" Seiji said gently.

"Seiji, you and the others were my first real friends. I treasure our friendship more than anything. But it is hard for me to see you kiss the woman I love. I try to stay rational but you got to understand that…I can't see you as much as you want. I wish I was in your shoes. I wish I could make her mine. I wish it was MY child she's bearing. However, I do not have any hate for you. You didn't cause this. I did. I should have listened to Shuu when he said to open my eyes to what was going on. If I would have been more aware of how I feel around Azhure, I would have been able to tell that around Kayura, it was only lust. Not love." He held his head in his hands. His love for the princess from another world was real and strong. He thought that, as the years passed, he would forget or accept her wedding with Seiji. However, it was still there. This burden in his heart was much heavier than his duty as a Samurai Trooper.

"I am sorry to cause you so much pain, my friend," Seiji told him after a long silence. "I figured you were suffering from my wedding but never in my wildest dreams would I have thought it was affecting you so deeply. You should have told her your feelings."

"No. I had no right to be so selfish. You were happy with her."

"I won't be as bold as to compare how deeply we love her, but I believe…you had to right to tell her how you feel. Maybe she would have take you and left me. Yes, I would have been angry at this but her happiness was important. And yours too."

"Seiji---"

"Touma," his friend cut his sentence firmly but nicely, "I do not want to lose you over this. I want us to stay close friends. Besides, we are still Samurai Troopers. Who knows when duty is going to call us again? If we're not united, we might not survive our next battle."

"I know…and you're right."

"So…what are we going to do?" Both men looked at each other. After a very long silence, Touma slowly stood up.

"There is nothing to be done, my friend. I have to deal with this myself. I believe one day, I will get over this. I will continue to see you just like now." He gave Seiji a warm smile. "I do wish you both a long life. You deserve to be happy. And I hope your baby will bring you more happiness."

"…Thank you, Touma."

"I will take my leave now."

"This early?"

"Let's just say that this conversation put me in an embarrassing position. I need to think over it a little."

"Will I see you again?"

"Yes," Touma said with a true smile. "Give me just some time. I'll try to come back to you before the birth so we can have a nice discussion about everything and nothing, the three of us." He put his hand on Seiji's shoulder as he was about to get up. "I know my way out. Just spend some time with her. You're not going to have lots of private moments like these after your child is born. Enjoy every moment with her."

"You know," Seiji said as Touma started to walk away, "you always were Orion's favorite." Touma chuckled.

"Is he still giving you a hard time?" Seiji laughed.

"Every single time I see him," the blond told him.

"I know you're taking good care of her. That's why I can come see you like this. She's having all the attention she needs. All I couldn't give her, you gave it to her. Continue like this and we will never fight about this." And on this, he left. As he walked out of the dojo, he felt a little lighter than before. He was glad that he and Seiji could talk truthfully about this. However, the pain in his chest was still there. He looked up to the sky and closed his eyes. He knew he will have to deal with this all his life.

The end


End file.
